2FKD

I haven’t blogged in a solid two years.  I point that out right off the bat, because while everyone on earth was catching blog fever I was getting burned out.  Having blogged nearly constantly since the age of fifteen, a full eight years of blogging had worn me out.  When you think about it, that’s not particularly surprising.  It’s tough to do something regularly for any decent length of time without getting bored with it, and that seems to be particularly prevalent lately.  Truth be told, I chalk most of it up to testosterone.

That isn’t to say that I stopped enjoying it; my problem was that I invariably ended up in a place that you couldn’t describe as tangential without blushing due to the massive understatement.  There were moments where I would write something, post it, get a response, realize I was wrong, realize that I was wrong because of that fucking tangent, and the only thing left to do was make an attempt at convincing myself I had actually been right all along.  If there’s one thing I’ve been accused of during my prolific 25 years, it’s arrogance.  Granted, I don’t like to be wrong, but I do a fairly good job of letting logic be the basis for my arguments.  As a result, I tend to be right.  I find it difficult to believe that someone of reasonable intelligence - certainly a mind capable of logic, at the very least - wouldn’t end up consuming my words and asking for seconds.  The number one justification for a red stamp of arrogance is being unyielding in debate.

As one person put it to me:  “It isn’t that you’re right.  It’s that you’re sure of it.”

So, I’m trying something a little bit different.  As I noted, it’s been a while since I did any kind of blogging, and I can already tell that my writing has suffered for it.  That being said, I’m not making an effort to tell people about this one.  It’s a domain no one knows, and in reality few are ever likely to know.  I’m no longer making the assumption that anyone actually cares what I have to say.

When I left my college town of Tucson there were few with whom I maintained regular contact, and after being here well over a year that number is fewer still.  I should probably be saddened at this fact, as those years in Tucson were a blast, but walking away from that life has placed a renewed strength in the friendships that remain.  I’m going to have some work to do beating back the tangents, but it’s been a long time since I’ve been able to say that I feel like I’ve got anything worth saying.

That’s an opportunity you have to take.